Everyone one has friends – of one kind or another. We have family friends, work friends, regular old friends, facebook friends, imaginary friends, animals who are our friends and some of us even have non-human friends. When you’re traveling with friends (no matter what kind of friend they are) it’s a good idea to set some ground rules so you don’t ruin that friendship.
I made the mistake one time of taking a cruise with two other girls. The three of us shared a single cabin – boy, did that test our friendship. I’ve traveled to foreign countries with several different friends and at times have shared hotel rooms and not shared rooms. I’ve done weekend road trips with friends and learned how to spend a lot of time in a car with other people. Each trip has tested friendships in different ways and taught me a lot about how to travel with other people. Here are some of my tips:
- Set the ground rules before you decide to travel together – you don’t want to end up on an island only to find out you can’t agree on anything!
- Travel with people you have things in common with and who have similar travel styles – don’t travel with someone who likes to wake up with the sun if you’re a late sleeper!
- Talk about what you’re going to do on your trip with there is disagreement – have a plan for how to handle the inevitable disagreement. If you want to go to the pool and the other person wants to go to the beach, how will you handle that? My friends and I handle this by agreeing that we don’t have to do everything as a group. If one person wants to do their own thing, that’s okay! If everyone wants to get Indian for dinner and 1 person doesn’t like Indian, they can do their own thing for dinner – we never change the groups plan to accommodate 1 person.
- Be flexible – when you’re traveling with friends, you have to be flexible with each other. Don’t sweat the little things. I have one friend who I travel with and she can literally spend an hour in the shower. It drives me nuts! I just want to get ready and go. I have to just deal with it and let it go or we’d never be able to travel together.
- Don’t pressure your friends to like things just because you do. I love volunteering while I’m on vacation and most of the friends I travel with don’t. That’s okay – and I never pressure them to volunteer with me. I usually volunteer when they’re doing something that I’m not interested.
- Talk about finances before you go – how will you handle paying for incidentals on the trip, what happens when one person in the group isn’t drinking and the drinks add up on the dinner bill, etc.. Talk about what type of places you’ll go to eat (you don’t want to make reservations at a 5 star restaurant if the other people aren’t prepared to pay for it!)
This December I’m taking a trip with three other women. I’ve traveled with one of them for the past 3 years. It will be quite an adventure and we’ll see how the two new women travel. We picked them to join us because they seem to have similar interests and are easy going – hopefully we were right!
How do you travel with friends? What rules do you set?
During the month of October I’m celebrating 1 year on BoardingArea by giving away 1 million points. The contest will run from 10/1/12 – 10/28/12 (please see the terms & conditions on the contest home page) Your first chance to enter will be tomorrow, October 1st, and here’s a hint: you’ll need a friend, a stuffed friend, and some creativity!
Doesnt sound like close friends
@Mike – nope they’re not always close friends!
This is a very timely issue for me. I have two friends I travel with and while there are lots of things we like to do that are compatible, there are inevitable differences. A couple of us like museums and one’s not a big fan. Two of us like sporting events while the other doesn’t care much about them. One is a very picky eater while the other two can make do just about anywhere. One doesn’t mind small group tours, one’s not a huge fan and the other wants to know who’d be in our small group before signing up! One likes to veg out while on holiday and the others take the view that we can sleep in at home – when we’re in a foreign country for a limited time we want to get out see what there is to see. Sounds like an impossible situation but we’ve been on a 12-day cruise (our first trip together!) and spent weeks in London and Hawaii for milestone birthdays. Next one of those big trips is not for a couple of years and I’m having a hard time getting them to play the points/miles game seriously. One totally refuses. I’m hoping that being able to pay for 2-2.5 weeks of hotels on points (maybe with a little bit of cash) that I can convince them to get in the game with me and we can see the world in style.
@Mickey – if you can’t convince the friend to start building up the points/miles, then start looking for other friends who are into into and are people you’d want to travel with.
Otherwise, if it’s someone you really want to travel with, you can do as you say, earn as many points/miles as you can and treat the person. I do that with one friend. I usually end up “paying” for the hotel with my points and cash. that also means that i get the bed and she gets the couch or roll-a-way bed! And she’s okay with that since I’m the one forking the bill. If she pays cash we take turns on the bed/couch. It works out in the end.
Travel super well w friends bc they are so laid back. I am the one that plans the down to the hour itinerary with the highlighted markers. Hotel/hostel locations and directions. Cost analyst trip of our trip. Copies of every known document.
Point analysts – discounts mileage earned etc.
Granted I Love the planning prospect but we all get to go the decided up places and they have less stress.
I have freaked people out w my OCD bc THiS (traveling a reservations etc) is when it comes out. But once they see this side they love how easy it is to travel w me.
But as w any friends compromises will be made and patience is tested. Best trip lasted 3 weeks backpacking in Europe w girls and worst have been a luxurious planned honeymoon with a man. Still my wonderful husband. You never know what a trip will be like ( different scenarios, personalities, breaking points, unintended joys, quiet moments) and that in itself is why you should just dive in and take them as much as u can!!
I think its important to feel comfortable splitting up at times and reconvening later. Everyone gets what they want and you will have new things to tell each other.